I was surprised to see a lot of people had already completed their internship with someone. It actually made me feel even more nervous and anxious. I felt behind everyone. Like the new kid still learning how to swim with a bunch of professional olympians. A girl who had just done her internship came up and spoke in front of everyone. She talked about her experience at her internship. She had worked with politicians and had made blunders but ultimately had an amazing experience and the people there had wanted her back. It made me feel better to know that she had made mistakes. While I know I'm going to do everything in my power to avoid making any mistakes, I know that it's going to happen.
We all got into smaller groups and talked about our fears an expectations going into the internship. My biggest fear is failing. Embarrassing myself and not being able to keep up with everyone at the Canberra Times. A lot of people have told me their experience there and how thrilling it was. How they were expected to write stories for them. It sounds amazing but also utterly terrifying. I definitely find myself doubting my skills. Am I going to be good enough? What if I break some rule or mess up? Talking with everyone in class about it, I found that lots of people had similar fears. I have to say I felt a lot of relief. It was actually funny to hear people say that their fear was that they would get there and decide they didn't want to do their degree anymore. That thought never occurred to me. I guess this is one of the things I know I want to do. I love writing and I love editing videos and audio tracks of news stories. I feel a sense of pride with it. Who knows though, maybe I will come out and decide that it's too much for me! I hope that doesn't happen. Even if I find that the newsroom isn't something I want to go into, just having the experience of being there is enough for me. Being able to get advice from respected journalists on how they have dealt with situations and stories they've encountered. How they come up with ideas for stories and what they do when encounter something they didn't expect. What drives them to do what they do. That's what I want to get out of my internship. It's not just about playing make believe that I'm a real journalist in a real newsroom. It's about the people I meet there and the experience I end up getting. Even if I'm driven to a point where I can barely breathe I don't think that I could have a bad experience because I know that there will be something that I'll grab from it. Even if it's a what not to do in this situation!
Going into this internship I know I'm going to give it all I have and more. Sometimes the best ways to learn and achieve something is to be thrown into the deep end. I know I'm going to struggle, but I also know I'm going to be with people that will give me a hand and help me out. As nervous and as scared as I am going into this internship, I'm absolutely looking forward to it. The Canberra Times, here I come!
